Sunday, June 21, 2009
So Much for Friends First
I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. The NY area has been like a rainforest this entire spring and with it being the first day of summer, that hasn't changed the wet pattern. It didn't stop me from going to the beach at sunset time. As I sat on the rocks I realized I feel so at peace lately and happy. I know there is something called a job I still very much need but I also realize that losing that job and the changes in me this last year has been the best thing that could have ever happened.
As for the dates, I didn't see the Brit because he mentioned having a home-cooked meal, as in, my inviting him over for dinner. That's just way too soon for me. I'm particular with what boys are invited into my apartment. ;) Besides my 1 year old nephew, there hasn't been another male in the place.
But as for going to a guy's apartment, I guess I can't say the same, dear readers...
The other morning I found myself waking up not in my own apartment, but in the one with the window that overlooks my very own. Yes, I had a very nice evening out with neighbor and apparently neither of us wanted it to end when we arrived home at 2 am.
We hung out at a bar for hours. Drank WAY too much wine and discovered my new favorite drink, Prosecco. It's an Italian, bubbly wine, even better than champagne. But be careful with it, it sneaks up on you fast, and left me in a mental state so altered that I actually did not do exactly as I had planned out in my mind -go home, as I always do, alone. I followed my gut feeling that he didn't seem as other guys have- asking me to stay over because he was after only one thing. It wasn't like that and nothing at all really happened. It was just so nice to lay next to each other and fall asleep. And yes, much too soon as I ever would have thought. But life is short, why plan things out, restrict yourself if it is all harmless and you're enjoying yourself, right? As I left I told him it's not like me to sleep over a guy's place so soon. He said, "Well, I'm really glad you did". And you know what? Nothing happened and so I was I - glad I did.
Gosh, it was nice to have a good date for once. He was sweet and even got me 2 pink roses from a guy who came around selling them in the bar. I remember the guy saying how happy we looked and that we would have beautiful children together. Gosh, if you want to scare the life out of a guy on a first real date, have someone say that to him. Leave it to me, it always seems strangers say crazy, but nice things that totally embarrass and make you laugh whenever I'm at a bar with somebody new I'm having a good time with. Must be the booze.
I remember some guys said to him, "Where did you meet her?" and him saying I live next door. Through a bird we met, I thought. Really, I couldn't have dreamed this all up.
And it felt like a dream walking into my building late at night, not alone for once, but holding his hand. Too soon, surely, as I was just going to try to be friends with him first. But the friends thing never seems to work when there is an intense attraction, does it? And after all the horrific dates, the guys who did kiss me goodnight when there was zero chemistry and all I wanted to do was run for the hills when they went in for the kiss...After the all too many years of bad dates, this was such a pleasant surprise.
And no matter where this all goes, as I am well aware it may go nowhere, it has given me hope. Hope to a hopeless romantic, and I hope to others, that one day as you're sitting at home alone, wondering why you're not getting what you truly want in life, the winds of fate go to work sending something your way you never could have imagined such as a bird to your window.
And in a heartbeat it can all change.